October

October and I have a love/hate relationship. It is a month ripe with memories; the best of the best and the worst of the worst. It's a month of reflection and remembering. Remembering the joy and the hope as I said, "I do" to Cale and the pain and the heartbreak of saying goodbye to my dad. The two most defining moments of my life all wrapped up in the same month...it makes for an emotional me.

As I was thinking about it today I realized how both of those moments were absolutely saturated in God's grace. They are experiences that reside at completely opposite ends of the spectrum, but are not separate. They are both pieces of me, my story.

A story of a loving God with plans so far beyond what I could ever imagine. He's the one who gave me a dad that showed me how much I was worth and taught me to never settle for anything less then God's best. God's the one who gave me a dad that walked by faith in ways I am still experiencing and gave me a passion for learning and understanding and growing.

And He's the same God who brought Cale into my life and everyday is the best there could ever be for me. He gave me a husband who daily works out this life of faith by my side and encourages me to think and grow and try new things. He gave me a husband who's belief in me is unwavering.

So today I'm sad, but God's grace is no less sufficient. My mind is full of memories and I will myself to recall new ones that I haven't yet remembered. Somthing else of my dad to hold on to, even for just a moment.

This weekend, I will be hopeful as I rejoice with Cale at what God has done in six years of our marriage. And God's grace will surround us in that joy, too. We will recount God's faithfulness to us and look to the future with great expectation.

There is much more to this story...but the theme will never change.

"And from His fullness we have all received, grace upon grace." John 1:16 (ESV)